This week has been especially challenging for me.
It was thrown off by sickness, starting with Rich and then somewhat Asher and I.
We have felt very worn out and stretched thin.
Because of our usual busy-ness of each week, I have tried to take advantage of staying home on days where we don't HAVE to get out.
And for some reason the walls of our house have closed in on everyone.
It could have turned into a great week with Asher and I doing lots of Christmas things and having great times together, but instead I chose to focus on the insignificant.
Looking back, I see very few moments where I put things aside to play with him.
I do see him wanting to spend time with me and so asking to help me with the "homework" ( as he calls it) Sweeping the floor and dusting and making beds...
I know, I am very glad to see him offer to help and it will pay off for his wife one day, but I know that I was just trying to stay busy.
A lot of people like to blame it on the season, and that may be so... between church activities, family parties, showers, extra jobs that Rich and I take on this time of year-- we were drained.
Only after a "try to rest" time when Asher got the best of my temper was I able to realize what a focus change I needed.
We have had some challenging days with Asher. He has really started spreading his independence and using some pretty disrespectful words and responses when we tell him something he doesn't want to hear.
Our response is that he needs to go to his room until he is able to talk nicely and with more respect. Let's just say that he's been in his room a lot lately.
It's very frustrating...
It's been challenging without outside time and then trying to figure out the nap / no nap thing I just have to trial and error.
Come 4 or 5 o'clock he's a mess.
Yesterday we fought until about 5 :00 or so and I had the idea to read the Christmas Story out of our Bible. I honestly didn't care whether Asher really sat beside me and listened with intent or if he quietly played cars on the floor below... I just needed to hear it. I needed to be quiet and read God's word.
His promise.
A promise of redemption..... for that day in particular.
Asher knows so much about Jesus and why he was born... already at 3 1/2! We talk about it so much and I am so glad that he thinks of Jesus before Santa as the meaning of Christmas.
Come to think of it, other than our Elf on the Shelf, we have not really talked a lot about Santa. And we actually don't have any presents from Santa other than his stocking.
We read from the promise of Jesus to the visit of the Magi, periodically asking him questions about the story to reiterate what we just read. Even though he didn't look like he was listening he sure was! He loves to hear about Herod and he doesn't understand how someone could fear/hate a baby.
I wish that I could say that that turned our whole day around... it didn't.
BUT... it did give another opportunity to show just how much we need a Savior.
Jesus doesn't have a naughty and nice list. He loves each one the same and offers the same gift to all.
Forgiveness.
For days like yesterday.
Thank you Lord!
You are such an example to me, Emily. I've been needing my own time-outs lately. These are the times I wish we lived closer. I would love to sit with you over coffee and talk about motherhood. :) You're doing a great job. Don't put so much pressure on yourself. You were never expected to be perfect. You are raising an incredible young man (soon to be young men!)
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